Get Smart!     Get Fit!    Get Right!

Do you need to get your mind right? Maybe you're stressed out or in a funk. It's important to have a positive outlook on life and improve your spirits. With this campaign, Dr. V. provides you with inspiration, motivation and advice to help you complete the New You by improving your attitude.

Get Right!:

Week One:

This week think critically about WHY you want to do this program. What do you want to achieve during the month? What could also be some potential barriers to you achieving your goals.

Write the answers to these questions in your notebook (that has your measurements in it).

Together, getting smart, fit and right should help you get on the right path, so you are focused and ready to make that lifestyle change and improve YOU.

Week Two:

What is self confidence? What does self-confidence mean to you? It is the ability to have a positive view of yourself and your situations. It is an inherent quality in all of us; it just needs to be developed and brought out in some of us!

We are judged by others every day whether it's at work, at home, or in the streets by people we don't know, but we cannot allow other's opinions affect and define our self worth. It is normal that we all cycle between positive and negative energy states during the week. But you should spend more time being positive and feeling confident. If this is not the case don't worry self-confidence is something you can build and develop.

Many factors affect the development of self confidence. Parents can impact a child's sense of self very early in childhood. Children that develop self-confidence have parents who accepting, encourage self-reliance, and love their kids even when they make mistakes. Parents who are critical, demanding or overprotective can cause their children t feel incapable, inferior, or inadequate. A lack of self confidence is NOT directly related to lack of ability: Often it is the result of too much pressure and unrealistic expectations of others such as family and society.

Parents aren't the only ones who can influence self-confidence. Friends can be more influential than parents in shaping one's views of self. Friends can actually have a bigger impact on a child's self-esteem. As children grow, they develop gain their own sense of self-awareness and perspective. The teenage and college years are definitive years. Young adults begin to re-examine, revamp, or strengthen their values and develop their OWN identities, but are still particularly susceptible to the influences of others.

People who are not self-confident:

1. Rely on the approval of others to define their confidence and self worth
2. Avoid taking risks because they fear failure
3. Generally do not expect to be successful.
4. Often put themselves down and tend to discount or ignore compliments paid to them.

People who are self-confident:

1. Risk the disapproval of others because they generally trust their own abilities.
2. Tend to accept themselves as they are
3. Don't feel they have to conform in order to be accepted

Self confidence is an aspect that may not pervade one's entire life. Some people may be very confident about their abilities in: athletics, academics, but may be unsure about their abilities in other areas such as: personal relationships, or their appearance

You don't have to feel helpless. Self confidence is INHERENT in all us. It just needs to be developed more in some of us. The first step is to battle the negative thought patterns you may have that prevent you from exuding your self-confidence.

Work on avoiding negative thought patterns such as these adapted from the University of Illinois Counseling Center*:

1. All or Nothing Thinking. "I am a total failure when my performance is not perfect."
2. Seeing Only Dark Clouds. Disaster lurks around every corner and comes to be expected. For example, a single negative detail, piece of criticism, or passing comment darkens all reality. "I got a C on one chem test, now I'll never get into medical school."
3. Magnification of Negative/Minimization of Positive. Good things don't count nearly as much as bad ones. "I know I won five chess games in a row, but losing this one makes me feel terrible about myself."
4. Acceptance of Emotions as Truth. "I feel ugly so it must be true."
5. Overemphasis on "Should" Statements. "Should" statements are often perfectionistic and reflective of others' expectations rather than expressive of your own wants and desires. "Everyone should have a career plan when they come to college. I don't so there must be something wrong with me."
6. Labeling. Labeling is a simplistic process and often conveys a sense of blame. "I am a loser and it's my fault."
7. Difficulty Accepting Compliments. "You like this outfit? I think it makes me look fat."

Dr. V's tips to improve self-confidence:

1. Step out of your comfort zone. Don' be afraid to take risks, they broaden your experience and increase your self worth.
2. Limit the noise from your inner critic: Quit the negative self talk. Eliminate self-defeating comments. Exchange those negative thoughts for self talk that is positive and uplifting.
3. Applaud your efforts and Celebrate your successes: Give yourself credit for everything your try!
4. Set realistic expectations and goals: Remember you can't do EVERYTHING perfectly, don't be hard on yourself. Perfectionism brings stress and failure. TRY your best and do things well.
5. Free yourself from should's: Live your life based upon what feels right to you, instead of what others think you should do. "Should's" distract us from identifying what WE really want and need, from identifying our own needs, goals, and abilities, what really fulfills us. Fulfill your own potential. Find out what you are good at, embrace and value that and fulfill your own unique destiny.
6. Assert yourself: make decisions for yourself and be firm and confident about your decision and its consequences.
7. Step up to solve problems: Problems arise, but the way we deal with them impacts our self-confidence. Don't run from problems, work towards a solution
8. Develop your skills: Assess what skills you need, learn, implement and practice them
9. Journal your successes: Jot down compliments you have received, awards, so that when you have a lower moment you can review your journal and bring yourself back up
10. Focus your energy on attracting more of what you want!! Be the change you want to be. Surround yourself with positive uplifting energy that promotes progress.
11. Respect your own needs: and wants first. Explore what truly fulfills you.
12. Self-evaluate, don't give your power away to others! Put more weight on your own opinion of yourself than on the opinions and evaluations of others! Depend on your own values in making decisions and deciding how you feel about yourself and what is right for you to do.
13. Remember your past does not determine your present or your future: Let that moment go, learn from it and move forward so that you can recognize your greatness!!!

You determine YOUR self worth, because it is truly YOURS. It is the most personal feeling and attitude and you owe it to yourself to make sure that the feeling is always positive. It embodies how you live your life day in and day out. Don't give your power to someone else. No one knows you like YOU do.

*University of Illinois Counseling Center: http://www.couns.uiuc.edu/brochures/self.htm